My Own Birth #4

I should mention that my first 4 children were all born in different hospitals and in 3 different states. My first two sons were born in WI... one in Door County, the other in Green Bay. My first daughter was born in VT and my third son was born in New York. I found that all of the Drs, nurses and hospitals do things differently and have a different idea of pregnancy and birth.

In between baby's #3 and #4 we had 2 losses. They were both shocking and unexpected, as losses usually are. They depressed me but I still wanted a fourth so we kept going for it, tho with much apprehension. Pregnancy was never the same for me and was riddled w/ worries. During the losses we discovered that I have a bicornuate uterus which supposedly makes pregnancy and birth more challenging...

My fourth birth actually begins at 31 weeks of pregnancy. We had a normal Sunday morning, went to church and then came home to relax and enjoy the day. My Mom had just taught me to knit the week before so I was working on knitting the baby a blanket. I could feel contractions, but having had 3 children already I figured they were just braxton hicks. It wasn't until I realized they were coming in a pattern that I started to worry a little. I got up and walked around, drank a ton of water, peed a lot, layed down to nap, got up... everything that I could think of to see if they would stop, but they didn't. Soon they were 3 minutes apart and lasting for almost 60 seconds. We figured we'd better get it checked out. I figured they'd stop when we got to the hospital and make a liar out of me.

Mom arrived to watch the children for us and we took off. I didnt' pack a thing, figuring we'd just be sent home. I got the the hospital and was hooked up the monitors... sure enough. Every 2-3 minutes at this point and lasting at least 60 seconds. They checked my cervix and I was dialated to 2, but had a ton of bloody show. I could actually see the worry on the midwife's face. She called the OB/GYN in to talk with me. They gave me mag/sulf and a steroid to mature his lungs if need be. The mag/sulf is horrible stuff... It really made me loopy. I remember feeling very out of it and struggling to stay aware of my senses and what was going on around me. It didn't stop the contractions... and they decided to transfer me to a hospital with a NICU just in case. The hospital was 3 hrs away and it was storming that night, so they couldn't medivac me like they wanted to.

It was a long drive. I had a nurse who I was scared of at first. She seemed to mean and gruff, but it turned out to be a good thing. She yelled at the ambulance driver and his helper when they were talking on their cell phones and smoking while driving!! I was thankful for that... I was nervous and uncomfortable, strapped laying down to a stretching while contracting and so loopy and out of it.

We finally arrived in Albany and there I felt like a guinea pig. It's a teaching hospital in a large city so they had students coming in to check on me or observe. It was actually quite humilating to think of how many people wer ein there watching a vaginal exam performed on ME! I realize I could have kicked them out, but I really wasn't thinking about it... I was still pretty out of it because of the mag/sulf.

Finally my contractions slowed down and I ended up being sent home a few days later, but was put on strict bed rest. Bed rest with 3 little ones!! Thankfully my Mother was able to take the children during the week and they came home on the weekends. I stayed on bed rest for 5 weeks. I was finally able to get up at 36 weeks!! I was so thrilled!! We had discovered that the preterm labor was caused by my son being transverse breech. We tried a inversion, but he flipped right back and so a c/section was scheduled for July 20th.

On the morning of July 6th I went to visit a friend. I was almost constantly contracting from the time I got off bed rest, but was still on a medication to stop the contractions or to prevent them from doing much. Coupled with his malpresentation the contractions were annoying, but didn't do much as far dialating. The whole time I was at my friends house I felt 'off'. The contractions seemed stronger and to be honest, I was grumpy. I finally left her house around 1 and started to drive home. I was concentrating on the contractions so much that I almost rear-ended someone whiel driving. It was at that point that I decided to pull over and call my midwives, who told me to come in.

I got to the midwive's office and waited around for my husband. He walked in just as they called me into the back room. I was so glad he was there to watch the other children... I really didn't want them to come back with me. The midwife checked my cervix and said "Happy Birthday, Erich! Today's the day!" I was 5 cm with a buldging sack of water and she didn't want to send me home!

I was elated!!! But nervous. I'd never had a cesarean and I hadn't even had my pre-op appt yet! They quickly went over what to expect, but I still had no idea....

I really hated it when they put the spinal in. He poked me 7 times! 7 TIMES! It hurt and made me jump each time and he would scold me. Finally one took and I felt nothing. They called Matt in and the c/s began. With 10 minutes Erich was born.... they showed him to me over the top of the sheild. I tried to touch him and they all yelled at me. Then they took him off into the warmer and the nursery. I lost 2 hrs after that. I guess they put me to sleep fully... I don't know what happened, but I woke up in the recovery room. They brought Erich in his bassinette and when I asked to hold and nurse him they told me I had to wait until I was in my room. I started to cry and Mom said "She just wants to hold her baby!" They consented. Imagine?! They CONSENTED to me holding my OWN child. I was upset.

Finally I got into my room and was able to nurse him... I felt so sad that I had lost time with him. I found out later that they had given him sugar water in the nursery against my consent... I was angry about that as well.

I'm not sure what happened except that I had lost a lot of blood during his birth. The first time I got up to use the bathroom I almost passed out. I could barely walk still when it was time for me to leave the hospital. A walk down the hall left me exhausted and breathless. My midwife offered a blood transfusion. She said I had lost enough to get one, but I turned it down. I just felt uncomfortable with idea of someone else's blood in mine.

I spiraled into PPD again after this birth. It's not surprising considering all that happened. I did know what it was this time, but only tried natural methods to get rid of it. I wasn't comfortable putting medications into my body and my sons body as I was breastfeeding him. Looking back now I wish that I had in some ways. It probably would have helped me to feel better and enjoy his babyhood a little more.

This birth was so different and so completely out of my hands. I wish I knew the reason for his malpresentation or why he wouldn't flip during the inversion. THe cord was around his neck at birth, so perhaps that's why.... I'll never know for sure. We had wanted a homebirth this time around and had spoken with a homebirth midwife prior to finding out he was transverse. But it wasn't meant to be...